Race against Cancer and how it changed my Attitude......It was January of 2001; I had my annual company physical scheduled, just as I had done for the past 25 years or so.
I was fortunate that the Company I worked for mandated and paid for executives of the Company to have an annual physical; otherwise I might have put off, or even skipped a year.
As the mammogram was taking place, the technician asked "have you felt that"?
Of course I hadn't, I did NOT do self examinations. I do NOW.
I really didn't think to much about what she had said, Or at least I didn't think I did, until one of my friends asked me that week-end if the doctor told me something that I wasn't telling. I had not realized that subconsciously this was bearing on my mind. So I shared with her what had been said, but explained that I didn't think it was anything to worry about, because for several years I had an injury that kept showing up, and it was probably that again.
After all 80% of breast lumps are benign.
When I received the call that week at work, I was very calm, worked all afternoon.
I didn't mention it to anyone.
Driving home that afternoon I thought… I have NEVER been sick, I had not missed a day of work in 40 years, I rarely ever had a common cold .I had only been in the hospital once, and that was to have a baby.
I had NEVER thought that I would be one to have CANCER.
I was the STRONG one in my family of five girls.....they had all had surgeries of different types, even one had cervical CANCER when she was 27.
As I drove home that afternoon I made up my mind that I would
WIN this battle. So I started to plan my strategy.
The first thing I knew I had to do was get my ATTITUDE in a POSITIVE SURVIVAL MODE, which I did!!!
My first surgery was done by a doctor that I didn't like from the moment I met him.
The doctor left the hospital without even talking to me. It infuriated my husband, daughter, and sisters. If you are ever in this situation....ONE thing to remember: Find a doctor you trust.
When I arrived home that AFTERNOON, there was a message on my answering machine:
The doctor had scheduled me for a mastectomy the next week. GUESS WHAT I DID....
I immediately called him back and said "CANCEL IT" and I will NOT be back.
One of my friends, which was a doctor, called me that very night; he had already heard my NEWS.
He asked it he could do anything to help; I asked if he knew anyone at Vanderbilt, would you believe his nephew was on the BOARD there. I had an appointed with the Director of the Breast Clinic on the following on Tuesday.
I went with my all my X-Rays, Pathology Reports from the past five years, and a notebook full of questions. The Doctor was fantastic, but talked as fast as fast as a freight train. So every
time there after I took a tape recorder, which he approved.. I didn't want to miss a word.
After a series of x-rays and scans, he confirmed that I still had cancerous cells. But, he did NOT
think a mastectomy was necessary. This was music to my ears. It is always good to get a second opinion.
He discussed with me a procedure that he himself had helped develop: a procedure called
MAPPING it is similar to that of a heart couth; he used needles, 11 of them to be exact, to injected radioactive active imaging into my breast, that showed exactly where the Cancerous cells existed. BOY WAS IT PAINFUL......but it was EFFECTIVE.
The Surgery was successful, my doctor didn't think from what he could see, that it was in the
Lymph nodes, but would NOT know for sure until results from the
Pathology Report came back, he said I could expect that in a couple of days.
The phone call came; sure enough it was in the two lymph nodes he had removed,
So back for more surgery, he removed 11 more nodes and also put the port in for my Chemo
Treatments, this was the only time I had stayed over night in the hospital.
That was a real experience. My sister had talked my husband into her staying with me, she was afraid that he might sleep to sound and not wake up if I needed him. I was in lots of pain, couldn't use either arm, it was hard to raise up out of bed, I kept asking the nurse to give me something for the pain.
She said she couldn't, it wasn't on the chart.....I never went to sleep.....Long about 1:00 AM, the hospital Fire Alarm went off. I had to wake my sister up, she was snoring and sleeping like a baby. Fortunately it was noting but one of the nurses burned her popcorn.
I went home waiting for the Pathology Report. WONDERFUL news This time all the nodes
were clear, I was to recuperate from my surgeries, then start my Chemo in four weeks.
Within the first week my arm and hand began to swell. I knew from what I had read and studied that it was lymphedema, I spoke with my doctor but he didn't think that it coud
possibly be lymphedema, it norally didn't appear this quick. So back to my surgeon to get it
checked out....to his suprise it was LYMPHEDEMA.
So I went to theaphy with the ATTITUDE I CAN WIN THIS BATTLE too.
I would have to wrap my arm every night, and wear an elastic sleeve and glove every day. The thearaphist told me I would have to wear this forever....But luckly I don't. I continue to sleep in an elastic sleeve on my arm, every night.
Did you know that more women survive Breast Cancer than any other type of cancer?
Over the next eight months I had eight rounds of Chemo and 37 radiation treatments. I never got upset or cried except when I lost my hair. It is NOT a pretty sight to look in the mirror and see yourself with not one hair on your body, not even an eye lash.
But I had purchased a wig, styled it to look as much like my hair as possible, wore BIG ear rings and bright color clothes, no one even knew when I had lost my hair, I had people ask me, WHY didn't you ever loose your hair? I proudly told them I was wearing a wig.
I loved my Oncologist.....he would always tell me I was his favorit patient, since I never came in complaining or talking about how bad I felt. I would do research and then ask him what his opinions were.
I went to work when I didn't feel like it. Some afternoons I didn't think I had the energy to
drive home. When anyone would ask how I felt, I always said GREAT,
I knew whatever I was focused on was what I would reproduce, so I was always GREAT.....
My Oncologist suggested I NOT get in large crowds and not be around youngters, because you
have a low resistance to disease. He even suggested that I might need to take a leave from work.
I had decided already that I would keep things as normal as possible. So I worked everyday, except the day I went for my Chemo, Went to Church every Sunday, went out to eat on the week-ends. Went to my grandsons baseball games. I did all the routine things.
I had a RACE TO WIN... I HAD to keep pushing forward...
Being diagnosed with CANCER is a stressful experience, filled with emptional
and physical issues.
My husband had always been wonderful and helpful around the house. but during
this time, he was exceptional. He was always there, along with my daughter and sister.
I was so fortunate to have a WONDERFUL FAMILY and so many friends at my side.
My husband took me for every treatment, although others volunteered.
He cooked, cleaned, washed and pampered me, as he always did. My Aunt stayed
with me during the day after each of my surgeries, God Bless Her Soul, the next
year she was diagnosed with cancer and she lost the BATTLE...
Most of our food was brought in from family and a host of friends. It was so much, we had to
ask people to wait a few days before bringing more food.
I am so thankful that I live in a community that is so caring and giving.
Beside food, I received hundreds of "get well cards", notes and encouragement from this
community and across the country, I know I received cards from every Church in this county.
I needed all the prayers I could get. These acts of caring & concern has certainly made
me more cognise about reaching out to people today.
One of things that strengthened me most was PRAYER,. I had always prayed, but my situation
had caused me to view prayer in a completely new light. I learned to TALK with GOD, rather than just to him. I used the 35 minutes I drove to and from work each day, to talk and plead with GOD. I feel my relationship with GOD has drastically improved, maybe that was the reason I had CANCER. I have always thought everything happens for a reason....
My sisters laughted and told me the reason I had CANCER was because neither of them could
have handled it.
Going thru all the test, surgeries, chemo, radiation treatments, and the ups and downs I managed to keep a POSITIVE WIN WIN ATTITUDE.
After all I had a wonderful family, with two wonderful grandsons, I wanted to see grow up,
and a host of friends from this community and across the country that gave me the WILL to LIVE....
When the challenges become more difficult, that's your opportunity to become more determined.
When the race is near, the winner is the person who picks up the pace.
It is easy to start out STRONG, but real achievement comes to those who finish
STRONG.....
I feel the experiences that I encountered has helped me to maintain a
POSITIVE ATTITUDE.
It will be six years this December when I finished my last treatment. I HAVE BEEN TRULY BLESSED.....
Alamo, Tennessee
No comments:
Post a Comment