My friend Kathy from Arkansas

This is the story of my friend, Kathy. In January 2003 Kathy called to schedule her yearly mammogram. She wanted to get it out of the way because she and her husband would soon be traveling to China to adopt their daughter. She was told they couldn’t get her in until March.

In February they traveled to China. When March rolled around she was a bit overwhelmed with new parenthood, so she called and rescheduled her mammogram for May. When May rolled around she was still busy and enjoying being a mom, so she forgot to keep her appointment.

It was not until December of that year, when she noticed “orange peel” skin on her breast; she quickly made an appointment with her gynecologist. He did a breast exam, couldn’t feel a lump, and told her it was probably nothing. He scheduled her for a mammogram, however, and two weeks later she was told that it was suspicious. Kathy had a surgical biopsy, and on New Year’s Eve 2003 got the diagnosis—stage 2B breast cancer.

Seven lymph nodes were affected. No doctor ever felt a lump. Her diagnosis came 10 months after they brought their daughter home from China, when they were really beginning to settle in as a family. It was very distressing to her when she realized that, had she gotten her mammogram in January 2003 as she had wanted, her diagnosis would have come almost a year earlier, however, they would not have traveled to China and would not have adopted their daughter—she couldn’t imagine life without her.

She spent most of 2004 undergoing treatment—a bi-lateral mastectomy, several months of chemo, and 28 radiation treatments. The chemo made her terribly sick, and radiation caused painful burns. When her hair started falling out she had her husband shave her head—with their daughter watching so she wouldn’t freak out at mommy’s new look. Her daughter turned two years old three weeks after her surgery.

Kathy spent most of the months of treatment tending to the special needs her daughter had as a recently adopted child. Toward the end of 2004 she had clear scans—hooray! But the stress of her cancer took its toll on her marriage. Several months after her treatment ended, she and her husband separated.

Kathy and her husband reunited in early 2007. Her scans continued to be clear until May, when the cancer returned in her spine. Two vertebrae were affected. At first she thought the problem was chiropractic. Between a bad cough from the flu and letting her chiropractor push on her spine, the two vertebrae were shattered. Once a bone scan detected the cancer, Kathy underwent a vertebralplasty—surgery in which bone cement is injected into the vertebrae to stabilize them. She then started radiation on her spine, as well as chemo.

The radiation inflamed some internal organs, which made her terribly sick. “Here we go again” she thought. Her daughter, now five, brought her ice water and cold wash cloths. Kathy felt guilty that she couldn’t play. The first time she had cancer she missed out on her daughter’s second year of life, now she’s missing out on quality play time with her daughter. It broke Kathy’s heart, but her daughter is a trooper, she understood that mommy was sick and needed her help right now.

The radiation is over and Kathy feels much better. The chemo has been much more bearable this time. She’s not sick as often, and she hasn’t lost her hair.

On September 26, 2007 Kathy went in to have scans to see if the radiation and chemo had helped. We’ve all been anxiously awaiting these scans…we just know she’s going to get good results. She’s a tiny little thing, but she’s got some fight in her! The scans came back clear! She only has two more months of chemo. Kathy kicked cancer’s butt not once but twice! What an amazing woman. What an inspiration. What a friend.

She once told me, “I have so much left to do in my life that I simply cannot let the cancer win.” I’m so glad she felt that way and fought through all the sickness and misery that she’s been dealt, because there are many of us that still have so much left to do in this life with her.

Rogers, Arkansas